Golf With Des

All about Golf with David, Elly and Stan! And probably some other stuff too…


Archive for August, 2006

Fireman Stan

Stan returns to work after his audition for the part of Fireman Sam without realising he didn’t completely change…

Fire, what fire?
I’m hoping he decides to sport his helmet during this weeks exciting game of golf on Thursday…

And, whilst you’re at Fireman Sam’s site, make sure you check out the Card Creator – Here’s the one I did for Stan…


Des Lynam

You all knew it would happen, so after weeks of Famous Des’s this week we are pleased to feature the King of all Des’s……DES LYNAM!!!!

Des is a housewives favourite and is primarily known for being the BBC’s Grandstand and Match of the Day anchorman.

However, he defected to ITV in 1999 and presented their football coverage. He soon got bored and retired in 2004.

He soon got bored again so returned to our screens, being a guest host on Have I Got News for you. After the death of Richard Whitely, Des wasted absolutely no time whatsoever in putting his hat in the ring to claim the dead man’s chair as host of Channel 4’s Countdown, a role he holds to this very day.

KP Reply!

KP have replied to the email I sent them earlier although it really wasn’t worth them bothering:

Thank you for contacting us by email in connection with a packet of KP Dry Roasted Peanuts. It is regretted that the packet contained an excessive amount of powdered coating and we would ask you to accept our apologies for the unfortunate occurrence. Please could you let us know the weight of the packet, the Best Before date and any coding deails from the back and also your land address. Upon receipt of these details we will be happy to reimburse you for your purchase.


Lets try again….

Score Cards

What fantastic round this week turned out to be!

The terrible weather, and then Waz’s 11th hour cancellation turned our normal weekly game into a drama fest!

Would the torrential rain stop our game?

Would Waz play or won’t he?

Would Stan cheat again?

After such an exciting build up we weren’t disappointed by the game either. Some solid golf was played by all and Elly Woods managed to keep out of the trees!!

On the 9th we all thought Stan had won until Elly did a recount and discovered that it had infact been a draw!

They should make this into a TV program – it has everything; tension, humour, pain, winners, losers.

Although I lost it a bit on the middle holes, overall I felt as though my game was a lot more solid than it has been and I guess some of the reason for this is because of my new bats and putter, although I think the biggest improvement has been my putting thanks to my new putter.

Scared of Water?

This week we would have been delighted to have introduced Waz to you but unfortunately, due to his severe phobia of water, he decided to pull out at the last minute.

To be fair, at 1600BST the rains were pouring down and we were also treated to an electrical storm. However, a quick call to Nottingham (thanks Lorraine and the girls!) helped us to establish that the storm would pass after about 2 hours and that tonight’s round would indeed go ahead.

1730BST came, and the rain was still coming down. Waz looked genuinely scared at the prospect of playing in such conditions so made his excuses and went home. Regardless, we bravely made our way to the course….

Surprise surprise, when we arrived at 1815BST the rain had stopped and all of a sudden it seemed pleasant enough to play. So play we did.

The usually rammed carpark was eerily quiet:

Elly, who had earlier displayed Wazlike symptoms of ’rainphobia’ was eager to start playing as soon as he realised he wouldn’t get too wet. Please note the emergence of a blue sky as shown in both pictures:

Amazingly, we all played reasonably well which was unthinkable earlier whilst staring at the lightning which was engulfing our local surrounds.

There was virtually nobody else on the course, the sun even came out for a bit and we had a thoroughly enjoyable game of golf which was reflected in all our final scores:

David & Stan: 43
Elly: 52

A new Non-Celebrity

This week we are joined by Waz.

Waz works in Marketing and is a dab hand at Eshots. Let’s hope he’s as good at Golf Shots otherwise he could find himself finishing last tonight.

The weather is particularly rubbish today and if the Beeb is to be believed we will encountering thunder, lightning and rain during our round.

If it is too bad we may have to cancel, but all being well we will tee off @ 1831 tonight.

Data Encryption Standard!

This week’s famous Des is a real treat for our more techy readers!

The Data Encryption Standard (DES) is a cipher (a method for encrypting information) selected as an official Federal Information Processing Standard (FIPS) for the United States in 1976, and which has subsequently enjoyed widespread use internationally.

In some documentation, a distinction is made between DES as a standard, and the algorithm, which is referred to as the DEA (the Data Encryption Algorithm). When spoken, “DES” is either spelled out (dee-ee-ess) or pronounced as a single syllable (dez or dess).

The origins of DES go back to the early 1970s. In 1972, after concluding a study on the US government’s computer security needs, the US standards body NBS (National Bureau of Standards) — now named NIST (National Institute of Standards and Technology) — identified a need for a government-wide standard for encrypting unclassified, sensitive information. Accordingly, on 15 May 1973, after consulting with the NSA, NBS solicited proposals for a cipher that would meet rigorous design criteria. None of the submissions, however, turned out to be suitable. A second request was issued on 27 August 1974. This time, IBM submitted a candidate which was deemed acceptable, a cipher developed during the period 1973–1974 based on an earlier algorithm, Horst Feistel’s Lucifer cipher. The team at IBM involved in cipher design and analysis included Feistel, Walter Tuchman, Don Coppersmith, Alan Konheim, Carl Meyer, Mike Matyas, Roy Adler, Edna Grossman, Bill Notz, Lynn Smith, and Bryant Tuckerman.

Data Encryption Standard InfoBox Diagram